I don’t know why all these peo­ple are all like “You can’t eat that bacon on this plane” or “I’m sorry sir but you can’t bring a ham sand­wich to a Bar Mitz­vah” All I know is that this is sup­po­sed to be a free country and once in a while a man needs to get his pork rind fix even though ever­yone else in the fune­ral par­lor is loo­king at him funny. So any­way Chro­nus deci­ded to swap things over to HAMROIC mode and what do you know, things star­ted to fall down with deli­cious and slightly salty ease! Grats on Ham­roic Stone Guard and Feng!

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Slip­ped disc cau­sing you pro­blems? Misa­lign­ment pla­guing your every move­ment? Come to Chro­no­prac­tors — Azeroth’s BEST AND ONLY 10 per­son chi­ro­prac­tic team! We’ll knead out that corrup­tion and knock away all those corrup­ted bloods! Our certified-in-Tijuana  not-actual-doctors will deal with those pesky hideous amal­ga­ma­tions and help to rid you of those out of place armor pla­tes! All this comes with our No Barrel Roll Gua­ran­tee™! Stop on by today and ask about our Fiery Grip Spe­cial!

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The Alliance should really start opting for the exten­ded warranty on their purcha­ses as it seems not even an airship can be kept in pro­per wor­king order during even the ligh­test of enemy ons­laughts! Chro­nus dealt with deck fires, dra­gon blasts and one very angry cow in the pur­suit of this heroic vic­tory; but per­se­ve­rance won the day and our heroes went home with the gold!

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Con­gra­tu­la­tions to Valin­dil who com­ple­ted the Legen­dary dag­ger pair Fangs of the Father tonight! Expect to see him pim­ping Golad and Tiriosh for some time!

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Con­ti­nuing the assault on Deathwing’s for­ces, Chro­nus found itself once again at the site of many vic­to­ries: The Eye of Eter­nity. This time howe­ver the oppo­nent was no cra­zed dra­gon, but the storm­bin­der Hagara! The bipo­lar babe alter­na­ted bet­ween ice and light­ning but neither frost nor shock could deter our heroes and they sent her pac­king and made her leave her key!

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If there’s one guy you can count on to watch your back… and front and top and pla­ces he shouldn’t really be watching really… it’s Zon’ozz! Chro­nus dis­patched the pee­ping tom by batt­ling eye tendrils(and claws and flails) with three-stooges like effi­ciency! Con­gra­tu­la­tions on another heroic kill!

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Chro­nus put Heroic Yor’sahj in his place
This weird bas­tard don’t even have a face

The boss falls down, the crowd yells woot
Areyn walks away with heroic conq loot!

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Well, he sneaks around the world from Agmar to Venoms­pite
He’s a pur­ple trans­lu­cent wyrm from Blac­krock down to Stran­glethorn
He’ll take you for a ride inside a twi­light realm!
Tell me, where in the world is Heroic Ultraxion?

Con­gra­tu­la­tions to Chro­nus on their second Heroic Kill in Dra­gon Soul!

Chro­nus Killed Heroic Ultra­xion on February 21st 2012

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Chro­nus killed heroic Cho­gall. They did a good job. There was cake afterwards.

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